Tuesday, 13 October 2009

Five Things You Can Do About Marriage Problems

By Kianna D. Sittig

This short article makes a great guide since it offers options to manage marriage problems. By applying the principles offered here, you have a method to preserve your marriage from the ravages of divorce and those issues that adversely affect the relationship and threaten its stability. Divorce is a destructive undertaking that harms the people involved, both adults and children. Homes and families have been ripped apart by it.

If you desire to find real answers, then you should rest easy knowing that you no longer need to fear the possibility of divorce. Do not become the victim. The concepts elaborated on throughout this article provide you great ways to avoid marriage problems. Once you have started using them, these tips are valuable for future use. If you want results, you must put them into practice. There aren'ty any shortcuts.

Ultimately, it will be both you and your spouse that will be working on this together. Of course, most of the time, you may be doing it alone. You may be the only person willing to do what is necessary to resolve marriage problems before they escalate. Troubled marriages can literally be transformed because one spouse or the other chooses to do the right thing. Surprisingly, the other spouse eventually joins the effort.

Five steps will be reviewed in this article. When you choose to employ them, the positive results may be seen quickly.

You will want to begin by examining yourself. Start by asking yourself what you are doing to make the relationship better. Not only should note the good things but also find out what you're doing to make your spouse uncomfortable.

Next, you should look for things to do that express your love for your spouse. You want to turn those ideas into real world actions that express the love and affection you have for him or her without using words. You want to do things that make your spouse happy. If you don't know how much to do at once, it might be better to start by doing one, thoughtful act every day. You may shocked by what doing one kindness can do to improve your marriage.

Beyond self-examination and doing good things, you will need to acknowledge those times in the past when you've overreacted with criticism, harshness, and irritation (particular when others were present). You must ask for forgiveness. Now, if you've behaved poorly for any length of time, more attention and time will be needed to attain results. You are trying to tell the offended spouse that you are serious about contrition and making amends. Your desire is to stop the marriage problemsfor the last time.

Next, you should spend a little time thinking about your spouse's good points. This will mean a search for attributes that you may find praiseworthy of mentionable. Sadly, if you've made it a habit to criticize and tear down, you will have a tough time looking for the positive. A kind word here and there can do wonders to heal the emotional wounds.

Once you've gone through the first four steps for more than three days consecutively, you may start saying I love you again. By not overusing the words, but rather attempting to illustrate them by the things that you do, you restore the power the words themselves. If you fail to lay the groundwork, whatever you want won't happen. No one wishes for marriage problems to arise and grow worse.

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