Wednesday, 6 January 2010

Do You Need Marriage And Family Counselors

By Zion J. Iwasa

Every relationship has their fair share of problems. After the 'break-in' period, couples begin to get a grip to their marriage and are able to solve problems easily. However, in some cases these problems seem to be very difficult to properly address - at least in your own knowledge and capacity. At such time, when the quality of marriage starts to deteriorate, marriage and family counselors become a requirement.

This article will help you determine when is the time to seek for a professional help:

Communication becomes a problem Communication is the foundation of a good relationship - so important in fact that when communication becomes faulty, everything just crumbles into pieces. Physical, sexual and emotional intimacy lies on communication so when everything you do is to shout, blame and keep quiet, your relationship is in trouble and you need to call for help.

You are contemplating divorce A real threat of marital collapse is when couples talk about divorce as if it is just a normal subject. If this word comes up in the table, if you play with the idea of it, and beginning to feel the fear of it, you don't need to wait for so long to call for help.

Conflict resolution Most couples think that counseling is only necessary after a major catastrophe (like infidelity) happens - the bad thing about this is that the relationship is already heavily damaged and the marriage is already impossible to rebuild. At this point, neither the cheater nor the victim desires to rebuild the relationship. If the fun is gone and you are less happy about the course of your marriage, you may want to think of getting an outside help. If your husband or wife is not willing to talk to a counselor, try to resolve the issues among yourselves. If you nothing happens after 3 months and you are still together, agree to go to therapy.

Fidelity issues The issue of infidel partner is perhaps the most difficult problem to resolve without an outsider's help. It doesn't matter if you are the one who have discovered that your partner is cheating or you are the unfaithful on-what matters is you need to recognize the necessity of finding a professional to help you resolve this very sensitive issue.

Improve marriage For most, marriage and family counseling is only necessary if the problems are already there and you cannot solve it among yourselves. This is not what should be thinking. In some cases, it is good to seek advice just to enrich the quality of your marriage.

Whatever motivation you have in seeking the help of marriage and family counselors, remember that you as a married couple, must possess a mutual agreement and cooperation upon taking this action. For counseling to be a success, both parties should understand the importance of an open wind and a willing heart.

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